Thursday, June 27, 2013

Journal entry 18 Feb 2010

I woke up to an alarm this morning and I felt energized and motivated for the day. Yesterday was the opposite -- I languished in bed and finally pulled myself vertical. It seems counter intuitive but I think I like restricting myself.

"Restricting" is negative word. Maybe it's more about making my decisions ahead of time instead of in the moment, when I feel vulnerable and I second-guess myself.

Second-guessing comes mostly from not knowing. Lack of information prevents good planning and that makes me wonder why we passed through the veil of forgetfulness. Surely we can use all the knowledge we can get, right?!

This is agency. Being a successful agent is more than just having freedom to choose. It means knowledge-gathering and planning. Deciding early what you want, remembering that desire, and acting swiftly and confidently in the moment.

What about spontaneity? Those who believe they preserve their freedom by saving decision making for the last minute are actually becoming things to be acted upon (objects), for it is at the last minute when we confront our most limited selections and we may be forced into a choice of two or more bad options.

Agency is not only a means to salvation. Ripened agency -- the fortitude to inform oneself and decide your course deliberately -- is also the very fruit of salvation. It is godliness.

1 comment:

Jancisco said...

First of all, I wish I could claim journal entries if such magnitude. Secondly, what a great insight. I think I'll read it a few more times to get it really in my brain.
Also, I'm going to need to call you so you can explain the Supreme Court convern on Facebook.